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scott w asked How do I organize chores better for my family?
My kids are 8, 5, and 2 years of age. We also have an 18 year old from our church staying with us.
And got the following answer:
I would say that the ages of your kids are so different that a rotating chart would be kind of unreasonable. You can give them chores that are appropriate for their ages now, and teach them things as they grow into different chores. For the two year old, you MAY get a bed made if it is a "big kid" bed instead of a crib which they couldn't reach. You can put mattress on the floor, or you can put a complete bed more in the middle so the child can get around it to reach the covers. Keep bedding limited to a fitted sheet and a comforter and settle for less than perfect work and the child will feel big and learn/improve as they go. Other chores for tiny ones: They can sort socks if they are different enough, like ankles and full length, or different colors or patterns. They can also put dirty clothes in the laundry basket for you to carry. They can also pick up their own toys, perhaps in a catchall container for you to put in the right place if you have extremely organized toy areas. When you are cleaning, more for supervision than anything, give the baby a spray bottle full of water and a rag, or a small broom. Then while you are really cleaning, they can "help" you and imitate your movements, spray things, pretend. It may take longer, and you may have to clean up sprays of water but you will get good time with your child, a chance for him to learn and get used to the habit of cleaning, and this is a great opportunity for you to praise him for work well done. The five-year old can be put in charge of setting the table (you put everything ON the table, they spread it around) making own bed, picking up own toys, perhaps organizing the toddler's toys. They can also sort their own clothes, put them away, helping with pets, sort recycling. They can monitor things like garbage and hampers being full, soap dispensers out, etc, (too complicated or heavy for a little one to do it, and yet easy to recognize the chore) and then YOU do it when they let you know...how's that for a switch?? By listening to and following their "directions" you role model the respect you want from them. The 8 yr old can be in charge of spot cleaning bathrooms, clearing the table, sweeping, vacuuming, carrying dirty clothes to the washer, helping keep an eye on the little ones, checking the mailbox, weeding the flower bed (show them what you want pulled each time), watering the plants, helping with pets. Put them in charge of letting you know when their kid-friendly food needs to be restocked and writing a list for the fridge before you shop. The 18 yr old can help with almost anything, I guess this would depend on your trust level with the kid since this sounds temporary and/or like a mentoring situation. If the kid is allowed to drive you can get help with kids' activities and transportation, taking kids out for haircuts, etc, and small outings while you relax, pick up/take to school, babysitting, cook one night a week, help with any part of the laundry process, mowing the grass, helping with garden, taking the cars for gas, lube, and helping detail the family vehicles, bathing the other kids and the pets, etc. To organize these, I would draw up a chore chart that assigns each kid to two or three daily chores and a weekly chore, perhaps a monthly chore if their jobs can go that long. They do their daily chores every day, and they do one different weekly chore every weekday and a monthly chore on a weekend afternoon each month. So you see that a child can learn a lot of different age appropriate skills. Some random hints: Try to get dad on board with a few duties as well. Teaches that housework isn't just woman's work, promotes unity in the family. Try to do as much as possible as a team. If there is a certain half-hour or so when everyone is home, no TV, no homework maybe some loud crazy music to motivate, then everybody can knock out most of the chores at one time and help each other finish until all the jobs are done and everyone can relax. This way, kids are around to see how other jobs are being done, can pinch hit if someone is sick, and can grow into other tasks, and learn compassion and teamwork by helping each OTHER. Set a timer for 5 minute increments until all the chores are done...at the end of each 5 minutes (or between chores) everyone pauses for a booty wiggle and high fives to keep the motivation and attention spans in check. Make it an enthusiastic fun time. Another big tip in particular is that all the kids no matter what age should be involved somehow in the kitchen and learning how to cook. Every night you can assign a younger "helper" and let them do whatever is age appropriate. The toddler can dump ingredients in the bowl and be your taste tester. The middle kids can open packaging, shape cookie dough and place on the pan, help with choosing side dishes, help stir, prepare things in the microwave, etc. The oldest can help with menu planning, cooking, and shopping, organizing the pantry, and cleanup. Again, you are probably not going to be making record time in the kitchen with little ones around but it IS quality time and teaching time, and you are getting them used to helping out. To role model respect and confidence, lways say please and thank you when asking and acknowledging hard work. Relax your standards so they can meet them. Also keep the big picture in mind. The reason you should be giving chores to children, far more important than helping YOU out, is to give them the training of life skills, the praise that builds self-esteem, and the chance to be needed for their contribution that they are making by helping out the family. This promotes each child's self-worth, sense of belonging and inclusion, self- and other respect, and confidence. You should never punish with chores...it derails that whole train. DON'T go behind a kid right after they do a less than perfect job, this will teach kids that it really doesn't matter whether they do their job or not...and that they don't measure up...which in the long run causes deeper issues in the family and more work for you, more resistance from them. Some cleaning tips for the family: Reduce the amount of linens that are in circulation. There is no reason why you can't wash sheets and put them back on the bed and this saves folding and putting the laundered ones away. Of course keep some extra sheets around for those nights when there is a crisis of some sort...flu, bedwetting, etc. Also keep towels in check, teach kids to hang and reuse their towels, wash once or twice a week. You may set up a color coding system so everyone uses their own color of linens...and then you know who left their towel on the floor. Another random tip for getting kids to help, make jobs as easy as possible. Starts with an organized home where everything belongs in a certain place, and where smaller systems are easy to use for everyone...for instance, hampers do NOT need lids! Without a lid, kids can toss their laundry in, instead of having to walk over, open the hamper, and drop their clothing inside. Another system that may need some help is setting up homework areas and quick-to-get places by the entrance for stuff that is always coming in and out of the house. I have heard these called "launchpads" and what it is is a bench, a row of old mismatched chairs, bins, etc lined up by the door...this area is for school backpacks, gym bag, instruments, 1 jacket, 1 pr of shoes, library books, rented videos, borrowed items that need returned, etc, and maybe a mirror on the door so you can all check your appearance before you leave. For you it means your purse, briefcase, cell phone and charger, car keys, etc. That's where all these grab and go items LIVE when not in use, and this cuts down morning scrambles a LOT. Containerize your stuff. Even on surfaces. When stuff is in a tray, a basket, or bin, then even if you don't feel like messing with each item, you can move the whole thing and clean up under/around it. Also helps keep order by defining a specific place where things should go. More than you probably wanted, hope this info helps you.